Procrastinator's Creed

I would like to preface this list with the admission that I did not write it. If, in fact, I had been given an assignment to write this list, it would still be on my desk, waiting for me to notice it. To whomever wrote this beautiful list: THANK YOU!!

1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done
already.

2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.

3. I will never put off until tomorrow, what I can forget about forever.

4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount
of bodily injury I could expect to receive from missing them.

5. I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new
technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.

6. I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the
amount of time given.

7. I shall never forget that the probability of a miracle, though
infinitesimally small, is not exactly zero.

8. If at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.

9. I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to
change my mind.

10. I shall always begin, start, initiate, take the first step, and/or
write the first word, when I get around to it.

11. I obey the law of inverse excuses which demands that the greater the
task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior
to beginning the greater task.

12. I know that the work cycle is not plan/start/finish, but is
wait/plan/plan.

13. I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.